Okay, here we go again—what if being a “badass” is actually just bad?

I know, I know. It sounds anti-cultural to even ask that, right? In a world that pushes women to lean in, hustle, compete, and conquer like men, has anyone stopped to consider if it’s actually a good idea? Every choice has pros and cons—so what’s the downside of women being strong, independent, and powerful? Isn’t it all upside when they make money, lead, and take charge?

Well, let’s walk it through.

The Hidden Cost of Competing Like Men

To be competitive, women have to take on high levels of stress and pressure every day—commutes, deadlines, office politics, performance demands, and leadership expectations. Dr. John Gray (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus) found that a typical workweek raises women’s stress levels up to six times higher than men’s. Yes, six times!

Why? It comes down to biology.

For men, stress can be productive. It sharpens their focus, boosts energy, and fuels achievement. Winning, competing, and problem-solving trigger testosterone, which not only reduces stress but also brings a sense of accomplishment. Men with structured, purpose-driven lives are generally stable, while those without it (passive males) often become irritable, emotionally and financially unbalanced due to low testosterone and higher estrogen levels.

For women, however, stress is destructive. Instead of testosterone, their bodies release adrenaline to power through tasks. But this triggers cortisol, which disrupts digestion, sleep, and weight regulation. It also strips your T-cells and immune system. Over time, this leads to exhaustion, anxiety, and burnout. The warmth and vitality fade from her eyes, and she becomes overwhelmed, dissatisfied, and ultimately unhappy. If she doesn’t stop, her body will eventually stop her—through illness, disease, or depression.

How many women do you know living this reality?

Is This What Equality Was Supposed to Look Like?

Is this what freedom and empowerment were meant to be? A life of exhaustion, loneliness and stress? For some women, circumstances left no choice—they had to do it all. And for that, I have nothing but respect.

But what if there’s another way?

Here’s a simple truth when it comes to men and relationships:

👉 Men love happy women.

Not overwhelmed, anxious, bossy, or exhausted women—just happy ones. And no, happiness doesn’t mean weak or powerless. It means fulfilled, peaceful, and aligned with who you truly are.

Re-calibrating how you operate in life is possible. I see it with my clients every week.

On my latest podcast (#80), my guest Jeanette Ortega—a fitness expert and life coach—shares her journey of breaking free from the stress and burnout that nearly cost her everything. Spoiler: Being a “badass babe” wasn’t the answer.

Go check it out on my website or listen here. You might just discover your own power in the process.

—Andre

In our culture, which has become increasingly feminized over the past few decades, the dominant communication style being encouraged is the feminine one—verbal expression. Speaking is women’s primary mode of communication with men, women, and children alike. There’s nothing inherently wrong with that. However, it’s important to recognize that:

“Speaking is a feminized paradigm, NOT a masculine paradigm in communication.”

Men, of course, do talk, but much less than women and for different reasons. Verbal expression is simply not a natural or preferred mode of communication for men. For women, this can feel like a problem:

“I only get a one-word answer. I don’t know what’s going on inside him—what he’s thinking or how he feels about me.”

Because speaking is such a natural and fulfilling way for women to connect, they often insist that men “should” be more talkative, open, and vulnerable with their thoughts and emotions. However, since men do not need verbal communication for connection—but instead use it mainly to exchange data or information—this often leads women to conclude that men are shallow, selfish, uncaring, or even defective.

That’s a big mistake.

These assumptions are not only inaccurate but completely misguided. Men do have deep feelings, but instinct compels them to keep emotions bottled up for self-preservation. For many men, revealing vulnerabilities can feel dangerous. This is an essential truth to understand about them.

Men Communicate Differently by Nature

For most men, talking is “work,” and they do it only when necessary. Long, emotional conversations or hours on the phone? That’s for your girlfriends, not your man—if he’s truly masculine. Deep down, you probably already know this.

Rather than making men wrong for their natural tendencies, it’s important to understand them and find a middle ground. Demanding that a man communicate like a woman will never work. If you’ve tried, you’ve likely experienced frustration. It’s not that he’s being a jerk—it’s that forcing him into a feminine style of communication is deeply disrespectful to his nature.

Imagine if men demanded that women stop talking so much because they found it irritating:

“You talk too much for no good reason. Get to the point already, I need you to stop talking unless you have something important to say.”

Can you imagine a man saying that? Yet that’s exactly what women do when they insist men communicate the way they do. Real men will never communicate like women, nor should they. Instead of resisting this reality, you can learn to appreciate and respect how men naturally express themselves—and in doing so, foster a stronger connection.

A Global Perspective on Communication

Other cultures seem to understand this dynamic better than the U.S. One of my clients, Michelle L., who grew up in France, shared her experience:

“I grew up in France and am better emotionally calibrated in the French way of embracing the feminine. That, mixed with understanding the more masculine, non-verbal, tactile communication style, works great!”

So, are you curious to learn how men naturally communicate—the way that feels most respectful and effective for them? Wouldn’t that be valuable insight?

Discover the Secrets to Effortless Communication

Join one of my programs and learn what truly works for men and why. Once you understand, everything becomes easier and more enjoyable.

As my clients often say:

“It’s so easy when you know what to do.”

Schedule your complimentary Breakthrough Call with me today:
https://projectequinox.net/contact/

On this call, we’ll identify what’s not working, explore your ultimate relationship goals, and determine how I can help you get there.

This call is my gift to you (a $397 value). Go for it!

– Andre